Bats

Bats at Work

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bat_wings

I had to send our office staff home, because we have bats at work.  I run a human resource company, handling human resource needs for small companies in the area that don’t have the staff or experience to handle it themselves. As you can imagine, my staff is extremely busy and I need them at their desks, but I won’t make them work in an environment where bats are hanging out on the ceiling or dive bombing employees.

Several of my staff had noticed the creatures flying around the roof line and entrance way a couple of weeks ago.  Admittedly, I didn’t think much of it.  I just assumed the bats were migrating and searching out insects for food.  Obviously, the problem was much greater than I thought.  I should have contacted Allstate Animal Control as soon as we saw a few bats, just so they could inspect the building and see if they were getting inside and roosting.  Now, they’re definitely inside the roof, the eaves and even inside the office space.

One of my best sales people was on a call this morning when she noticed a bat on the ceiling in her office.  She held it together and finished her phone call, but then ran out of her office and slammed the door behind her.  Thank heavens it didn’t fly around her head, and everyone knew enough to leave it alone and not try to pick it up or anything.  Yes, I have insurance for my staff, but I’d hate to have to send anyone to the hospital because of an unsafe work environment.

I just don’t want to risk having one of our employees being bitten or scratched by a bat, and you can just imagine the kind of chaos several bats cause.  No one can really focus on their work, and some of our employees are genuinely afraid of them.  So, I made the decision to send the staff home, and need to take get rid of the bats as quickly as possible so they can either return later today or tomorrow morning.  My employees who get paid by the hour are concerned, too, because they don’t want to lose out on their paycheck.  They also don’t want a trip to the hospital because of a bat bite.

I have no idea how many we have, but I need the bats removed quickly so my employees can safely go back to work.  I also want any holes or gaps sealed up so I don’t have to deal with this again.  In this economy, well, in any economy really, what business owner can afford to shut down operations for any length of time because of wild animals in the office building?

Coyote

Coyote in the Neighborhood

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A coyote
A coyote causing problems in a neighborhood.

The closest I’d ever been to a coyote was when some friends and I were hiking and camping in the mountains of Northern Utah.  We’d stopped for a break while hiking, when my friend pointed to a cluster of trees about 2 football fields away from us.  An animal bounded out of the cover, moving fairly quickly.  At first, we all assumed it was a deer, because it was about the height of a deer, a brown/tan color, and moved easily through the underbrush.  Then, I noticed the bushy tail and the fact that it wasn’t “bounding” so much as “loping quickly.”  We concluded it must be a coyote and finished our hike, since it didn’t get anywhere near us.

But, then, a few years later, I took up running.  I especially liked running early in the morning, just as the stars start to fade and the day begins and everyone is still sleeping.  It’s a time of day that feels secret, unsullied by life’s daily worries.  Then, I turned a corner and came face to face with it.  A coyote in my neighborhood.  Well, when I say face to face, I really mean it was about four houses away.  Coyotes can run fast, up to forty miles an hour, and I knew I had no chance of outrunning it if it decided to charge.

There was a timeless, breathless moment as I stared at the coyote in the neighborhood, wondering if I was about to be seriously hurt or maimed, and what I could possibly do to stop it.  They say you’re not ever supposed to surprise a wild animal, as if the world was populated by idiots who enjoy sneaking up on natural predatory creatures and yell “Boo!”  If I’d known there was a coyote in the neighborhood, you can bet I wouldn’t have been running alone at that time of day, hoping to surprise it.

That coyote just looked at me and finally simply turned and walked off in the opposite direction, without another glance at me.  I made it safely home and immediately texted the Home Owner’s Association president to let her know we had a coyote in the neighborhood.  And, I think I’ll take up swimming.

Bats

Bats In The Attic

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bat_wings        As a local handyman for hire, Tyler sees a lot of weird things, and it’s not unusual for him to be called to a customer’s home to take care of some problem or other, and have it turn out to be something completely different.  A “loose roof shingles” call may end up as a raccoon in the attic, accessing the space through a hole the raccoon tore in the soffit.  In another service call, an air conditioner unit that only worked sometimes was actually caused by a squirrel chewing through the wiring.  That one was sobering, because if Tyler hadn’t spotted the problem quickly, it could have resulted in a home fire or it could have electrocuted someone.

Once, Tyler got a call from a guy who didn’t want to tell him any specifics over the phone.  He just insisted on having a handyman come over and investigate the attic.  When Tyler got there, the man offered no further explanation other than he had heard odd noises at night coming from the attic.  He was so hesitant to explain the problem, and he was obviously terrified.

Finally, Tyler put him at ease and the man confessed.  “I think it’s the ghost of my grandmother.”

That was a new one.  And, Tyler wondered, just what was a handyman supposed to do about a ghost in the attic?

The man went on to explain that he had inherited the house from his grandmother, who had passed away two years ago.  He had lived among her things for a time, and finally got up the courage to pack up her keepsakes and stash them in the attic.  He’d done that almost exactly a year ago, and now he was hearing noises above his head each night and sometimes in the early morning.  He’d lost sleep over it, and was too afraid to confront the ghost in his attic.  Apparently, his grandmother had not been a very nice or understanding woman.

Fortunately, Tyler didn’t believe in ghosts and good-naturedly climbed the stairs up into the attic.  In the end, he almost wished it had been a ghost.  He was not prepared to find hundreds of bats in the attic.  His flashlight and movements disturbed the roosting bats in the attic, and they swarmed, hitting his head and face and shoulders in their panic.  He’d never seen so many bats in an attic, and it was all he could do not to scream as he climbed back down the stairs and explained what was really going on to his client.  The man was relieved it wasn’t the specter of an angry grandmother, but it was just bats in his attic.  Tyler felt differently.  He made it out to his truck, where he allowed himself a mild freak-out attack before calling Allstate Animal Control to get the bats out of the attic.

Pigeons

Pigeons in the Carwash

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pigeon_crap3          We all thought my sister Marcy was making up the dumbest story. She kept saying that she saw pigeons living in the drive-through car wash, which was totally stupid, because there’s no way  they would survive in there, with all the machinery moving and the soap spray and everything else going on in there.  Of course she said she tried to take pictures of them with her phone, but that’s just when the soap covered her car, or the picture was too blurry with water spray or the big spinning brushes in there.  Convenient.  Pigeons in the car wash, but no way to take a picture of them?!  Yeah, right.

Mom and Dad are letting us share a car, but we have to pay for the gas, change the oil regularly, and make sure it stays clean.  Course, that works in theory for my parents, cuz they don’t have to drive us around all the time, but it means that Marcy and I fight all the time over the car.  When Dad threatened to take the car away if we couldn’t work things out, we decided we’d both contribute to the “Car Jar”, which means a little bit of both of our paychecks goes into the jar to pay for gas, carwashes, stuff like that.  Then, whoever goes to get that done just pulls the money out of the jar for it.  It kind of works.  But, we still fight a lot over who has to do what, and who gets to use the car each day.  We just don’t fight around Mom and Dad anymore.

But, every time it’s Marcy’s turn to get the car washed, she complains.  She doesn’t want to do it herself, so she takes it to the only drive-through car wash.  Fine, whatever.  But, then she complains that the pigeons in the car wash freak her out.  Plus, she says, why should she wash the car there if they’re just going to poop on it as soon as she drives out.  I thought she was just making it up because she hates having to do anything like wash the car or vacuum it or anything else.  She’s pretty lazy.

So I finally said I’d take the car through the drive-through wash, just to shut her up.  When our car was dirty enough to justify the ten bucks, I headed on over with Marcy in the passenger’s seat.

Wouldn’t you know it, even with the spray and soap and brushes everywhere, I could see some pigeons in the car wash.  One of them was sitting on the tiny ledge above a window, and another pigeon actually had a nest on top of the big dryer that moves up and down.  There were eggs up there!  Marcy said that was new, and she finally got her picture of the pigeons in the car wash.  She took the picture just before our car went under the dryer and right before that pigeon pooped on the windshield.  Unbelievable.  Guess my sister’s not as stupid as I thought.  We showed the manager our picture and got another free car wash out of it, but I got the impression they already knew they had pigeons in the car wash and just didn’t want to do anything about it.  Marcy made a deal with me – I always wash the car at home so she doesn’t have to go to the car wash again, and she puts a little extra money in the Car Jar.  Works for me.

Mice

Mice in the Pantry

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Rat (1)           Quitting my diet cola drink is hard enough.  The headaches, mood swings and general feelings of “unwell” are evidence that those little cocktails of carbonated water, caffeine and chemicals are not exactly healthy for the human body.  When I’m going through diet soda withdrawals, normal life is difficult enough, and then today I discovered mice in the pantry.

Life’s been full of big changes for me lately.  I just graduated from a masters program in business administration, I just got laid off from my job, my boyfriend and I just got engaged, and I’m putting my townhome on the market while looking for a house with my fiancé.  So, of course, I think it’s a great idea to quit drinking diet soda and start an exercise routine so I can look and feel my very best on my wedding day.  I’m stressed, on edge, even though most of my life changes are mostly for the good.  Well, except for the job loss, of course.  That’s a special kind of stress.

After a frustrating wedding planning session with my mother, I decided to clean out my kitchen in preparation for the upcoming move.  I’ll admit, I haven’t been in that pantry for a good, long while, subsisting through the last few months of the masters program on take-out and vending machine food.  I had no idea there were mice in the pantry until today.

I pulled items out, wondering what those little black things were on the shelves and the tops of the cans.  I finally realized those little black things were mice poop around and on top of my food when I saw little holes chewed into pasta and cereal boxes.  That’s really put me over the top today.    Mice in the pantry!  Right when I’m trying to sell the place.  Crap.

I easily got the pantry emptied out by throwing everything away.  I called Allstate Animal Control to get rid of the mice from the pantry.  And, I am now enjoying a heavily caffeinated diet soda.  Fine.  I can quit some other day.

Bats

Flying Bats

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Bat (2)           A bat just smacked my brother right in the face!  Hahahahahahahaha!  I think I’m gonna pee my pants, I’m laughing too hard.  He was being a Class-A Douche, hitting on my friends, bragging about how much he can bench press and how many curls he did this morning with 50-pound weights.  Like he thinks that’s gonna impress my friends.  I’m like, we’re in the arts program, dude.  The guys that impress my friends actually think and have interesting lives, you know?

My brother steals my friend Melissa’s beer, finishes it, and walks over to the diving board to do his stupid diving trick.  Like we want to stop watching the sunset and talking about Melissa’s photography project just to watch his stupid butt hit the water.  But, he finished the beer and tossed the empty bottle at us just to get our attention.  Just as he jumped off the edge of the board, a bat flew right into his face!  He was screaming when he went under the water!  Blahahahahaha!

Yeah, of course he’s okay, but now he’s walking around all pissed off about bats flying around the house, and yelling that he’s gonna need rabies shots.  What an idiot.  It’s not like the bat bit him or anything.  Not even a scratch!  He’s just got some kind of macho wounded pride thing going on, and it’s making him even dumber than normal.  He’s got Mom’s tennis racket and he’s just swinging it around at the few bats flying around us.  I’m not gonna lie, I’d freak too if a flying bat hit me in the face.  It just couldn’t have happened more perfectly!  Just when he was perfecting the Douche Cliché, he gets smacked by a flying bat.

Melissa’s got her camera out and she’s capturing the moment.  My brother’s conflicted, cuz he obviously wants to impress Melissa, so he’s not yelling at her to stop taking his picture or anything, but somewhere deep inside he’s probably aware he’s acting like a spoiled kid.  I have no idea whether her pictures are going to work in her photography show, maybe under the heading of “Wounded Man”, but whatever she doesn’t put up in her gallery, I’m getting from her and putting it in my “Idiot Brother” collection.  Seriously, if you get hit in the face by a flying bat, just laugh about it, don’t make it worse by stomping and yelling and chasing it.

Squirrels

Squirrel on the Roof

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Squirrel (5)           My father, dressed in his suit, stood on the desk in his home office, barking at the ceiling in the hopes of scaring away a squirrel on the roof.  My father is a tall, stately man, well-traveled, speaks several languages, and easily converses with industry leaders and heads of state.  So, it was surreal to watch this calm, thoughtful, knowledgeable man lose his cool completely and bark at the ceiling.

The squirrel on the roof had become increasingly bold over the previous weeks.  In the beginning, my nature-loving family enjoyed watching the antics of this squirrel jumping onto the roof from the nearby trees, sweetly gnawing on the seed and nuts we left out for it, and grinning up at the ceiling when we’d hear the little pitter patter of its tiny feet.

In the end, that squirrel on the roof drove us all mad.  Around five in the morning, I could hear it running around above my bedroom.  My mother would find squirrel droppings and shell hulls scattered around the front porch, dropped from the roof.  And, my father, who did so much of his work from his office at home, was constantly interrupted by the sound of the squirrel chewing whatever it was chewing in the attic space right over the office.

We finally stopped feeding it, and tried chasing it away when we saw it in the trees or running around the yard.  My parents had me clean out the rain gutters while they searched for holes in the roof or attic.  We would think it was gone, and then it would come back within a day or two, finding some new way into the house.  Mom was afraid it was a female squirrel building a nest for squirrel babies.

We tried everything we could think of, but that squirrel kept coming back.  The squirrel would run around on the roof, the squirrel would chew things in the attic, and we could not get rid of that stupid squirrel!

Which is why, one day when my father was preparing for a very important meeting, he finally snapped when a tiny little squirrel foot broke right through the dry wall on the ceiling.  Little bits of ceiling rained down on his laptop.  And, my stoic father jumped up on his desk and barked at the ceiling.

Mom made a phone call for help.  Not for Dad’s mental state, but help to remove the squirrel from the roof and seal up the attic.  Dad has never barked at the ceiling again.

Raccoons, Skunks

Mild Winter and Nuisance Animals

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Skunk (2)            I recently had an enlightening conversation with the pest control technician who was sent out to my home to help me battle the explosion of insects that are attacking my neighborhood this summer.  He said their company is extremely busy this season, due to the fact that Utah experienced a relatively mild winter during the 2013 to 2014 season.  While skiers and snowboarders lamented, and all of us worried about future water levels, we admittedly enjoyed the fact that we experienced fairly beautiful weather.  But, that has meant an increase in critters like Miller moths, earwigs, carpenter ants, slugs, snails, crickets and grasshoppers.  Frustrated homeowners are keeping these pest control companies busy this year!

A relatively mild winter gave rise to an increase in the insect population.  And, now we are seeing an increase in the bird population.  Utah just approved its first crow hunt because the crow population has tripled over the last twelve years.  New rules now allow Utah homeowners to kill nuisance birds if other efforts of getting rid of them are unsuccessful.  The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service reports an 8% increase in the duck population in 2014.   My neighbors have remarked how surprised they are to see more robins and pigeons than we’ve ever seen in this area before.

So, let’s follow the logic.  More prey means more predators.  With a growing bird population, we’re likely to see a growing population of raccoons, snakes, skunks and other animals that feast on both insects and birds.  A growing population of nuisance animals means they will expand their territories.  With such a feast of prey, nuisance animals may not need to root around in garbage cans or steal food from domestic animals, but we are likely to see an increase in animal dens under homes, raccoons nesting in attics or chimneys, and skunk dens under porches or stairs.

The damage these animals can do to property ranges from offensive smells to house fires and everything in between.  Raccoons easily tear through roofing or siding materials.  The smell of skunk spray is notoriously hard to get rid of, and can cost homeowners thousands of dollars to replace items that have been sprayed.  Animals in and around your home, such as raccoons and skunks, are a noise nuisance, cause offensive odors, threaten domestic animals, cause costly property damage, and can harm you and yours.

Let’s follow the logic just a little bit further.  Mild winter equals bigger insect population, which feeds a larger nuisance animal (predator) population.  And, those nuisance animals are in turn preyed upon by a larger tick and mite population.  When raccoons nest in your home or skunks move onto your property, they bring with them the insects and diseases hiding in their fur, on their skin and in their feces, which in turn infest your home or property.

I know, this all seems a little doom and gloom.  It’s just nature.  But, there is help.  Allstate Animal Control is a national network of nuisance animal control technicians.  These people know what they’re doing, they know these animals and the particular places they like to hide.  They are experienced at humanely removing nuisance animals out of your home or other buildings, off your property, and can clean the area and repair the damages the animals caused.

Get proactive and protect your home and property against these nuisance animals before they cause property damage and health issues.

Raccoons

Raccoon Family in the Cabin

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Raccoon (2)When we went cheap on our vacation, we did not plan on having to share a summer with a family of raccoons.

The economy might be improving, as reported on the news, but it has yet to get better for most of my friends and me.  So, summer months are filled with inexpensive “stay-cations.”  We avoid the theme parks, the costly water parks, and even long, gas-guzzling drives.  Instead, we do splash pads, camping at free sites, fishing at the local pond, and plenty of hikes in the mountains.  We skip the high priced tickets of the zoo and museums and opt for a day at a friend’s farm or science projects around the house.

So, when an elderly neighbor couple told us we could use their mountain cabin for several weeks, we were elated!  In return, we were going to do some repairs around the place and spruce it up for their trip up there later that summer.  It was a win-win deal for all of us.  We packed up the truck, threw in the kids’ toys and sleeping bags, and off we went!  The four of us chatted and sang and watched the beautiful mountain scenery go by as we drove deeper and deeper up the canyon and into a side canyon where the cabin sat.  This was better than a theme park, because we’d be able to enjoy it for weeks, spend lots of time with each other and fish and hike and swim to our heart’s content.  This was going to be the best family vacation ever.

Following the directions, we finally headed down the dirt and gravel road that led to the cabin.  It wasn’t a mountain resort, by any means, but it was going to be all ours for the next several weeks.  We stopped in front, the kids spilled out of the truck’s cab, and my husband couldn’t stop grinning.  I was ready already planning where we were going to set up the hammock as soon as lunch was ready.

My husband unlocked the front door and we all brought our heavy loads in, arms full of bags of food, coolers, camp chairs and other mountain living necessities.  The cabin had obviously not been occupied in a while, at least not by humans.  The bright windows illuminated the clouds of dust we stirred up, and the place smelled dank and foul.  “Ewwww!” my six year old said, plugging her nose.  I exchanged an uh-oh look with my husband.

My son, oblivious to the possible gross-ness of his surroundings, kicked open a bedroom door and stomped on in, plopping his load down on the nearest cot.  I carefully placed my load on the small table in the tiny kitchen and followed my son, a vague warning dying on my lips.  He was silent and still, staring at a large raccoon baring its teeth at him and standing in between my son and three raccoon babies.  I could tell by the look on my son’s face he thought this was the coolest moment of his nine years on earth.

The frozen moment passed and I blew into action, grabbing my son and backing quickly out of the room, slamming the door as I passed the threshold.  I then picked up my bewildered daughter and charged out the front door of the cabin back into the relative safety of the outdoors.  At least there, we were not confronted with raccoons who might feel cornered or bite or scratch us, necessitating a trip back down the mountain to the nearest hospital.

My husband figured it out quickly enough when he bravely opened up the bedroom door to see what had caused all the fuss.  We shared the cabin with a family of raccoons.  We had to re-think this whole mountain resort situation if we were to deal with raccoons in the cabin.

We discussed all the possible ways of dealing with the situation while our children threw rocks into the nearby creek.  It was imperative to get the family of raccoons out of the cabin before we could even begin to clean up the mess and start on repairs.  We certainly weren’t going to enjoy our mountain retreat until we got those raccoons out of the cabin.

Finally, we realized we should just handle the situation the same way we would handle it at home.  We wouldn’t try to remove the family of raccoons by ourselves like some bad 80’s cartoon.  I would drive back down the mountain to the nearest town with cell reception and contact our neighbors, the cabin’s owners.  I would suggest to them that they call Allstate Animal Control.  Allstate Animal Control could easily remove the family of raccoons out of the cabin, and I knew they’d also take care of some of the cleanup and repair.  Then, my family would finally be able to move into the cabin from the tent we staked, and we could get back to the business of fixing up the cabin and enjoying the heck out of our mountain vacation.  Lucky for us, our neighbors agreed and we were quickly back on track with one of the best family vacations we have ever enjoyed!

Skunks

Skunk in the Window Well

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skunk          Skunks are not good climbers, so when a skunk falls down into a window well, it can get stressed, dehydrated, panicked and then spray.  You may not even be aware you had a skunk in the window well, but when the smell hits you, you’ll figure out soon enough that you have a skunk problem.

A woman I know works at a hospital and often works the night shift.  She came home in the early hours one morning, stepped out of her car, and gagged on the smell of a fresh skunk spray.  Skunks have poor eyesight, which is ironic since they are nocturnal, and one had fallen down into a window well leading to the half-finished basement.  Unfortunately, her teenage son had been painting the walls of his soon-to-be-bedroom the evening before and had left the window slightly ajar.  It wasn’t wide enough to let in the animal, but the sharp, musky, oily scent of the spray got in.

My friend initially thought a skunk had gotten inside the house or was somehow in the basement, so they were afraid to go and investigate.  For hours, they tried to combat the stench, not realizing they had a skunk trapped in the window well.  Finally, the animal was discovered, and they figured out what must have happened.  But, what to do?  They wanted to help the skunk in the window well, but they didn’t want to risk getting hurt or sprayed.  Of course, they were concerned the skunk might have rabies, too, so there was no way they were going to approach it to try to help get it out of there.

My friend lowered a spare piece of wood they had lying around in the garage, hoping the animal would be able to climb out at an angle.  They had a bad moment when they were trying this, because the animal was skittish and panicky and turned around, lifting its tail as if to spray again.  Everyone ran for cover and the plan was abandoned.  After a while the skunk tried to walk up the lumber, but the angle was still too steep and it couldn’t make it out on its own.

Exhausted, after working all night and coming home to a stench and a mess and a wild animal in the window well, my friend finally gave up trying to handle the problem on her own.  She made a call to Allstate Animal Control, and they sent someone out to take a look at the problem and remove the skunk.  They even knew how to get the skunk smell out of the basement.  Of course, my friend got window well covers installed, and now so do I.  I don’t want to ever go through that kind of drama.