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Raccoons

Raccoon in the Crawlspace

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raccoon traps too small

When you see the words “raccoon in the crawlspace” written out in black and white, on an email, it seems like a straightforward problem that can be solved by a nuisance wildlife removal service, like Allstate Animal Control.  But, when you’re standing in the shower, late at night, and you hear scratching and shuffling coming from the other side of the shower wall, it feels completely different.  You feel vulnerable, and it’s spooky, and childish fears make you remember horror movies in which shower scenes are never good, and it takes a while for the adult in you to kick in and realize you probably just have a raccoon in the crawlspace.

 

That’s what happened to a distant relative of mine.  She and her husband live in a nice condominium in a settled neighborhood.  They don’t exactly live in the boondocks – it’s not a heavily forested area, nor is it surrounded by farms.  Neither the previous owners, nor their neighbors had complained of wild animals in the area.  So, a raccoon in the crawlspace was the furthest thing from her mind as she prepared for her shower one late evening.

 

It had been an extremely long day.  She’s a junior high school teacher, and she had a couple of rough classes followed by parent/teacher conferences that lasted late into the evening.  Of course, she wasn’t done with her day when she got home, because she had papers to grade and a test to work up.  It was normal when her husband kissed her after putting the dinner dishes in the sink, and retired upstairs to watch some television before bed, while she worked on into the night.

 

A few hours later, after hunching over paper after paper, she decided a nice, warm shower was the perfect way to unwind before bed.  She quietly entered their master suite, so she wouldn’t wake up her husband, got her things and went into the bathroom.  She turned the water on hot and let it warm up while she lit a candle and turned off the lights.  Soon, the hot water was raining down on her neck, relieving some of the tension that had built up over the day.

 

Then, she heard the softest little scratching coming from behind the wall.  At first, she ignored it, figuring it was really just the sound of the water.  It happened again, though, and again, and her mind started racing.  It didn’t sound at all like the house settling, or water through the pipes.  It wasn’t a mechanical sound.

 

She managed to keep her mind from wandering too much down the paths of old remembered horror movies, and she managed to keep from shouting out to wake up her husband.  It soon occurred to her that they probably just had a raccoon in the crawlspace, and she would have to do something about it tomorrow.  She’d send off an email to Allstate Animal Control first thing.  The only thing she’d have to decide is whether or not to tell her husband before his morning shower . . .

 

 

Raccoons

Pest Control – Raccoons

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Pest control ain’t just for little critters like roaches and ants.  Pest control is for any pest, including the coons that keep stealing my food, and I’m not too sure my old bones can handle it.  I usually sit up in my cat tree, overseeing the household affairs and making sure all is well during the night.  I’m an old cat, but I still make sure my house stays nice and safe through the dark hours.  In all my years, I’ve done my job well and handled a lot of the pest control around here.  I keep the mouse population under control, I’ve scared off more than one rat in my time, and I keep the property pretty much free of voles and gophers.  But, when pest control includes getting rid of raccoons, I have to draw the line.

The people I live with keep my dry food in a big bin, close by, so they can keep my bowl filled all the time.  It’s a nice, satisfying deal.  They give me a warm place to sleep and lots of food, and I handle the pest control.  But, one night, a little black paw came right through my cat door, followed by a black snuffling snout and black-rimmed eyes.  My food bin and cat tree sit right by the door, and I guess that raccoon decided to come right on in and steal it.  I’ve run up against a coon only once in my life, and it wasn’t pretty.  I still have the scars to prove it.  So, I was a little more than cautious when that critter came right through my very own cat door, bold as you please.  I slunk out of sight and watched the whole thing.  I’m great at rodent pest control and insect pest control, but raccoon pest control is best left to someone who knows what they’re doing, and won’t end up with bites, scratches or worse.

That raccoon came in and walked around my space, snuffling around the food mostly, but also taking a look up in my cat tree.  Good thing it was hungrier than anything else, so it pretty much just ignored me.  With those paws, it easily dragged the bin over to the cat door, and hopped back outside.  Sticking its head back through the plastic door, it easily popped that top right off the bin and dug in.  Now, I’ve been trying to do that for years, but I’ve never been able to get that tight lid off.  That raccoon made it look so easy, and I growled in jealousy as I watched.

Soon, it was joined by a second raccoon, and I wished raccoon pest control would show up right then and get rid of the raccoons.  Unfortunately, it was late at night and I was the only observer, so I was forced to just watch as the two of them devoured my food right in front of me.  They were too good to stick their snout right down into the bin.  No, they were too hoity-toity to do that.  They dipped their paws in and pulled out just enough to fill their mouths daintily.

To my delight, someone else in the house woke up.  I don’t know if they’d heard the noise or if it was just luck, but humans bumping around and turning on lights scared those two coons off.  I have no idea what they thought when they saw the bin in front of the door, lid off.  Hopefully, they’ll figure it out and get raccoon pest control out here soon.  I just want to go back to chasing mice and rats, sleeping in my cat tree and eating my food.  This old cat can’t handle much more than that, I’m afraid.

Raccoons

Raccoon Control

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Mama Raccoon says I don’t know anything about the world, but in my whole life of two weeks, I’ve learned a lot about raccoon control.

Mama loves to tell us the story of how she hunted high and low for the perfect place to have her perfect little babies.  My two sisters and I are, of course, perfect.  Before Mama had us, she walked through the forest.  She found a big log that was hollow and would protect her babies from the rain, and thought that maybe that would be the perfect place.  But, there was already a little family of skunks living in there, and she almost got sprayed by Mama Skunk, so she got out of there.  Then, she found an abandoned car with soft seats filled with wonderful fluffy stuff that she thought would be perfect to keep her little babies warm.  But, there was a nest of rats living in there already, and she didn’t want her babies to get bitten by nasty little rats, so she moved on.  Then, she found a little area under some stairs right next to a big bowl of cat food, and she thought it would be a good place to have her babies, because it would be so close to food.  But, some people tromped up and down those stairs all the time, and she was scared they would get raccoon control out there and take her away.

Finally, she crawled up and up onto a person house, and looked through a little crack in the roof above a porch.  It was indoors, so it would keep her babies safe from the rain.  It was filled with fluffy insulation, so it would keep her babies warm.  It was close to a woodpile just outside, under which lived delicious little mice.  And, no people went up there all the time, so she thought she would be safe from raccoon control.  It was perfect.

So, Mama made that little crack into a big, big hole so she could get up in the roof over the porch.  She is very strong, so she just pulled back the roof and tore into it until she could safely get inside.  Then, we came along, and Mama was very happy.  Sure, we stained the fluffy insulation, and sometimes we were noisier than we should have been, but mostly it was a perfect little life.

Until, one day, a man heard us moving around up in our perfect little home.  We heard some metal scraping on the concrete below, which turned out to be a ladder.  The man poked his hand up inside.  In his hand was a bright, bright light, and I wanted to get closer.  Mama picked me up in her hands and held me close to her, and she pushed my sister and brother back behind her.  Then, she went up to sniff and growl at the light.  It went away really quickly, and we thought we were safe.  But, a few hours later, raccoon control showed up and we were taken out of our perfect place one by one.  Mama says she’ll find us another perfect place for us where we won’t bother people anymore.