Tag Archives: swallow removal

Exterminator

Davis County Exterminator

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I so desperately want the Davis County Exterminator to get rid of my brother.  Look, we’re all baby swallows, tucked up safely in this nest under the eaves of someone’s house.  But, I swear, this nest is getting smaller and smaller by the day.  He’s just crowding me out and cramping my style.

Mom went through a lot of trouble to make this mud nest for us before we were born.  Bit by bit, she brought tiny chunks of mud from a small distance away and stuck it up on this stucco, right over someone’s front door.  She brought in some tiny twigs to help give it structure and took her time to build it just right.  Sure, some of it fell down and spattered across the doorstep, and some of it inevitably got dropped on cars or sidewalks on her way back and forth.  But, it’s wonderfully safe, making it extra hard for any predators to get to us.  And Mom says now that us baby birds are here, the Davis County exterminator has to obey really specific laws about how to remove barn swallows, so we’re pretty safe even now.  I don’t want the Davis County exterminator to get rid of all of us, just my brother.

After we hatched, Mom worked super hard to keep us fed, and let me tell you, we’re ALWAYS hungry.  All day long, the four of us crowd at the tiny nest opening, sticking our heads out, opening our beaks as wide as possible, and taking our turns getting fed.  But, not my brother.  He always pushes and shoves, and switches places with us to try to trick Mom into feeding him twice before she gets to the rest of us.  You know, he almost pushed me right out of the nest the other day, and since he gets fed more, he’s getting bigger and bigger and it’s getting harder and harder to push back.  But, the rest of us baby swallows have had it.  We’re saying enough is enough and starting to fight back.

My sister came up with a great idea the other day.  When Mom flies off for another morsel of food, she stands up, gets on the edge of the nest, and turns around to poop out of the nest.  We learned to do that early on – let the poop fall down out of the nest onto the front step of this house instead of staining our own nest.  Well, when she’s done, she spreads her wings just a little wider and pushes big brother further back into the nest.  By that time, Mom’s back and the rest of us get a fighting chance to get the food.  It was perfect until big brother caught on.  Now we’re back to getting pushed around a lot.  So, I’m wondering, what would it take to get the Davis County exterminator to get rid of one big baby swallow?

Swallows

Get Rid of Swallows

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swallow removal

I’m just a sweet, old tabby cat who wants to take naps in the soft grass in the backyard instead of worrying about how to get rid of swallows.

There is a spot in the backyard that is a little spot of cat heaven.  It has been my spot and mine only for the last three summers.  The grass is soft, and wonderfully fragrant right after a good mow, the sun hits it just right in the morning, so it’s warm on my belly, but not too warm.  It’s right in between the house, where I have food and water, and the grouping of trees with its luscious and plentiful squirrels and birds.  I can chase them, if I want to, but as the years go by, I prefer to think about the chase as their chitters and chirps invade my cat dreams in the sun.

But, this year is different.  This year, my perfect napping spot is tainted by the presence of swooping, angry mud swallows.  At first, I enjoyed watching them as they flew between the small nearby pond and the house, tiny bits of mud in their beaks.  They would daub the mud up onto the house itself, right under the eaves, building up a nest.  I didn’t think much of it, although occasionally I would gather up enough strength to rise and swat at them as they flew overhead, especially after a little glob of mud rained down on my nose.

Now the nest is built, and I thought it would mean the end of the incessant flying back and forth and back and forth.  Little did I know it was about to become worse.  Now, my thoughts are on how to get rid of swallows instead of dreaming of chasing squirrels and deciding whether to go inside and eat or stay and sleep.

The eggs have hatched, and the tiny baby birds are amazingly noisy, keeping me from fully falling into my cat dreams.  To make matters worse, the two adult swallows now see me as a threat, and actually try to chase me out of my perfect cat-napping spot.  They swoop down on me, daring to get close enough that I think I’m going to get a beak in the neck if I’m not careful.  I have to watch the two of them at once, attacking and swirling around me.  I leap, and twist and bat at them with my powerful cat claws, but they circle around too fast and avoid my half-hearted attacks.

One of these days, I’ll figure out how to actually get rid of swallows.  Swallows come back year after year after year, and I just don’t want to deal with the constant chirping and dizzy swooping.  Sigh.  Maybe I’ll just look for a new perfect napping spot.

Swallows

Swallow Removal

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“My job is to sell cars, not remove swallows,” I protested.  I’d only been working at this used car dealership for three weeks, but I’d already had this conversation with my boss several times.  She looked annoyed at me, which was dangerous, because I really needed this job.  Already it was paying better than my last job, and I’d been able to pay off a credit card bill down to a zero balance, so I wanted to keep it.  I was really good at it, too, and I knew my boss was as happy as I was with my success.  She was also tired of having this conversation with me.

“How do you expect to sell cars when there is a swallows nest in the undercarriage?  Or when it’s all covered in bird droppings?”  She sighed.  She was excellent at her job, too.  I just found out she’d been here less than a year, but she’d pretty much saved the car lot from going under.  She’d hired better salesmen, got a great working relationship with a local bank that offered good rates to our customers, and improved the look of the place to attract more business.  It had paid off and the place was making more money than it ever had.

But, over the last few weeks, she found out she had a swallow removal problem.  Swallows descended on the car lot, for some reason.  They made little mud nests in every nook and cranny they could find.  Mud nests were tucked up under the eaves of the main building.  We’d found swallow nests in wheel wells, car undercarriages, and in the rafters of the garage we used to detail the cars.  Swallows return year after year to their roost, and the previous manager hadn’t done anything about it, so we now had a booming swallow population on site.

Under new management, swallow removal was added to every employee’s job description.  And, I was getting tired of it.  I wanted to get to work, dressed nicely and ready to sell cars.  Instead, I had to help hose down half-built nests.  I’d carry special cloths to wipe swallow poop off a car that I wanted to show a client, and then I’d feel filthy until I was able to get back inside and sanitize my hand.  Sales meetings focused on swallow removal techniques instead of the best sales methods.   We’d tossed around ideas ranging from covering the entire lot in bird wire to installing a sonic bird repellant device.  A co-worker half-jokingly suggested getting a falcon or two to get rid of the swallows.

I knew this was a real sticking point with my boss, and it was for all of us, too.  She didn’t want to sink a lot of money into a scheme that might not work, and I think she was hoping the problem would just go away soon.  I handed her the phone number of a swallow removal service, and she finally conceded that it would cost her a lot less money to get professionals out here to get rid of the swallows.  Maybe, just maybe, we won’t have to go through this again next year.

Swallows

Swallow Problems

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When I took this job as property manager for an assisted living center, I was told that I’d probably have to deal with “a little” swallow problem.  Yeah, right.  I guess it was a little problem with swallows a few years ago, but none of my predecessors did anything about it, so now I’m stuck with a huge amount of barn swallows dipping and swooping.  At least they keep the mosquito population down, but I don’t feel as if it’s worth it.

Our property is close to a city park, and this time of year there’s a big mud hole in one portion of the park.  The swallows carry the mud, beak-full by beak-full, and use the mud pellets to build their nests right under the eaves and up against the stucco.  Of course, that means I’m constantly cleaning up mud pellets off of the sides of the buildings and off the sidewalks.  I try to catch every nest, and my crew is out there nearly every day power-washing the mud pellets off of walls instead of taking care of other maintenance jobs.

I have a ton of phone calls from some of the nature-loving residents who are mad that we are trying to keep the swallows from building there, and other residents who are mad that we haven’t been successful at getting rid of the swallow problem entirely.  While I sympathize with the residents who enjoy watching the birds flying around outside their window, I have to think of their health and safety first.

The mud and swallow droppings that accumulate on sidewalks and doorsteps are a serious hazard.  Residents, employees and guests can easily slip and fall.  The risk of falling is bad, but more people complain of swallow droppings staining their cars, dropping on their heads or shirts.  An unexpected “swallow bomb” is no fun when it’s in your hair, on the side of your face, or staining your shirt.

Once baby birds have hatched, the swallow problem gets even worse.  Not only do you have more birds staining the sides of the building, walkways and doorways, but the adult swallows get aggressive.  In an effort to protect their nests, they dive and attack anyone who walks nearby.  We had one resident who was actually hit in the head by a swallow, lost his balance and was injured.

And then, there are the bugs.  Little swallow bugs that bite like fleas.  They get inside the buildings, hide behind wall art, in beds, in outlets.  Even the nature-loving residents, who root for the swallows to finish building their nests before my power-washers hit them, are much less enthusiastic when confronted with bugs in their beds.  We’re struggling with insect extermination as well as trying to remove the swallow problem.

Of course, as swallows are federally protected, I have to be very careful we’re not breaking any laws in our seemingly fruitless war against the birds.  At certain times of the year, the problem with swallows takes priority over everything else, and the other demands of my job are left incomplete.  It has become too costly in time, manpower and funds to handle this problem alone.  I have finally decided it is so much more worth it to get a professional wildlife removal service out here to take care of the problem, so I can get on with the business of managing this property correctly.

Swallows

Get Rid of Swallows

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get rid of swallows
            We’d been trying to get rid of swallows over the last couple of weeks.  They were trying to build their nest right above our front door, and the mess was terrible.  Bird droppings and bits of mud just littered our door step.  So, we’d knock it down before they finished building the nest and sweep it away, just to have them come right back and start again the next day.  It was irritating, but we just had to be vigilant and get rid of the swallows’ nest every day before they finished.

            Then one day, I went into my laundry room to transfer the clothes from the washing machine to the dryer, and I was startled by hearing this rustling sound.  I have no pets or children, so the sound was unnerving.  Again, this scratching, scrabbling sound, a rustle, and then quiet.  Just gave me the creeps, especially since I was alone in the house, but I had to find out what was making that noise.

            I listened again, and figured out the sound was coming from behind the dryer.  I grabbed a broom, but really had no idea what I would do when I came face to face with whatever was making that noise.  I took a deep breath, wondering if I should wait until my husband came home.  “No, I’m a big girl and can handle this, whatever this is,” I told myself.  Crawling around the dryer, I squished myself into the small space between the wall and the appliance, scared something would come running out at me.

            But, nothing did.  And then I saw the strangest thing.  The dryer vent jumped.  I cracked my head on the shelf overhanging the dryer in my shock, and then composed myself again.  At least whatever it was, it was contained within the dryer vent.  Oh, crap!  It jumped again! 

            Okay, enough was enough.  I tossed the broom out of the room, and prepared to grab the dryer vent out of the wall and the dryer simultaneously.  Whatever it was, it was going to have to leave, and now.  Counting to three . . . then to five . . . then to ten, I finally jerked the vent hose free of both connections and held the ends together, the silvery hose forming a circle.  The bottom of the circle jumped and bounced, hitting my shins, but I kept the ends firmly together and marched out of that laundry room, up the stairs, and, realized I needed at least one hand to open the front door.  I maneuvered an elbow to undo the deadbolt, and then, with my two pinky fingers, managed somehow to open the door. 

            I took two steps out onto the porch and threw the entire silvery hose out into the front lawn, watching in suspense to see what would come out.  To my surprise, two swallows flew out of the hose and up into the tree, angry and terrified.  I hadn’t expected birds, and I didn’t expect them to be the very same birds trying to build a nest on our front porch.  Well, I was determined to get rid of swallows one way or another, and I guess they were just as determined to use my house, one way or another.

Swallows

Swallow Removal

swallow removal
“Hey there, Lila, you call for swallow removal, yet?”  Emily asked her neighbor.

            “What do you mean?  Why would we want those pretty little birds removed?”  Lila was a pretty brunette who loved animals a little too much, in Emily’s opinion.  Emily liked her home pristine and cats, dogs, birds and turtles were just mess-makers in her opinion.  Lila, however, liked the company and noise of her animals, and obviously enjoyed watching wild creatures, too. 

            “What?  You don’t want to get rid of them?” Emily asked, incredulous. 

            “Why on earth would I do that?  I just love to watch little Miss Flighty build her nest.  She’s so pretty.”

            Inside, Emily groaned.  Lila had actually named the little bird, and it wasn’t even a clever name.  She probably had picked out names for all the babies in eggs that hadn’t even been laid yet. 

            “Well, I guess you don’t mind the mess she’s making on your front porch,” Emily said, as nicely as she could.  The little bird was building her mud nest, bit by bit, on the stucco overhang right over the front porch.  The porch itself was slowly accumulating a pile of mud and bird droppings.  Emily knew it was going to stain the concrete, but she also knew Lila probably didn’t care one way or the other about her front porch.

            Lila, however, was enjoying watching the little bird from her window.  She loved noting the daily progress of nest-making.  Swallow removal hadn’t even crossed her mind.  She was an avid bird-watcher, and had put up several bird feeders in her back yard.  This was a real treat for her.

            Emily tried again.  “I sure hope no one slips on the bird droppings and falls.  They could sue.”  Emily wasn’t really known for her tact. 

            That got Lila to thinking.  She’d been cited before by the city for having too many pets than were allowed, and didn’t like to think what would happen if she were sued by someone.  But, still, these were beautiful wild creatures and she loved watching nature take its course.  She said as much to Emily.

            Emily nodded, and said she figured the joy of bird-watching probably outweighed the likelihood of legal action.  But, then, she brought up something that Lila hadn’t known.  Swallow bugs. 

            “Swallow bugs?”  Lila asked.

            “Oh, yes, they’re blood suckers and they live on the birds.  Of course, they sometimes drop off and infest wherever the birds are living.  They’re like fleas and will attack cats or dogs or . . .”

            Lila called for swallow removal the moment Emily left.