Tag Archives: snake in house

Get Rid of Snakes

get rid of snakes
Ahhh, life is good.  I’ve got people who get rid of snakes for me.  They keep me safe under this beautiful glass house, where no birds can get at me.  I have all the food and water I want, and even get plenty of cheese from time to time.  When I feel like a good run, I jump in this wheel thing and just go at it with total abandon.  Yup, life is pretty . . .

            What was that?!  A hiss?  Coming from where??  No, I couldn’t’ be.  My people got rid of the snakes, didn’t they?  Unless they didn’t plug up all the holes leading into the house. Ohhhhh, no.  It is a snake.  I kind of see it now – its ugly little head gliding along the floor, long ugly body following.  If I stay real still, it probably won’t see me.  Can’t get up here on this high table, anyway, right?  Maybe?  Perhaps if I run behind my food bowl and wheel it won’t notice me up here.

            Move along!  Nothing to eat here.  Aaaaeeeee, it knows I’m here!  And, here it comes.  Run!  BONK!  Stupid glass house.  Pant, pant, run!  BONK!  Aaargh!  What to do??  Where to hide??  Jump!  Jump!  Freeze.

            It’s closer, closer.  It’s just staring at me.  It knows I can’t run.  Just . . . can’t . . . stop . . . shaking.  I back into the corner and sit back on my hind legs, and go still.  If I have to face death, I will look it right in the eyes.

            BONK!  I shake my head and stare.  What just happened?  I grin.  Well, as much as a mouse can grin.  The stupid snake is kind of swaying a little.  He hit the glass pretty hard and I was safe inside.  Just to test my theory, I bounce a little and wiggle my nose at him.  THWAP!  That stupid snake hit his head even harder this time.  Hilarious!!  This day just went from awful to awesome.

            I shimmy on up to the glass wall, right up in front of his little beady eyes.  “You look so mad, you could just shed your skin right there.”  Okay, as taunts go, that was kind of lame, but I’m just warming up.  “Aaaah, don’t get your tail in a twist.”

            I jumped up into my running place.  “Look at me!  I’m a meal on a wheel!”  I ran even quicker.  “Now, I’m fast food!” 

            “Thank you, thank you.  I’ll be here all week – too bad you won’t be.  Try the chicken.  I mean, really, try the chicken cuz mouse ain’t on the menu.”

            Just then, my people come home.  I squeak to get their attention, and eventually the big man comes running over.  He grabbed that sucker right behind its head and got rid of that snake.  I just hope they plug up all the holes this time so he can’t get back in.  Maybe, if he does, I’ll have some new and better material next time.

How to Get Rid of Snakes

how to get rid of snakes
“Shhh, shh, sweetheart.  Go back to sleep, honey.”

            “But, Daddy, there’s a snake in my room, I know it.”

            I hated that I couldn’t be sure she was wrong.  My daughter had been terrified for two days ever since my wife saw a snake in our bathroom.  It was gone by the time she’d gotten me, and we didn’t know where it was, or if it was even still in the house. 

            For a while, we’d suspected something like this.  I’d found a shed snake skin in one of the downstairs closets, and we’d been hearing noises in the walls for some time now.   The rustling noise in the wall behind my bed was often loud enough to wake me up, and now we were finding evidence of a snake.  My wife described what she’d seen to me, and we were pretty sure that it wasn’t one of the couple poisonous snake.  But, I wasn’t comfortable with “pretty sure,” and the thought of a snake, even a non-venomous one, biting my wife or my daughter had me pretty upset.  It was keeping my daughter awake at night now, too.

            “Shhh, pumpkin.  Don’t worry, I’m going to get rid of the snake.” 

            “I can’t sleep, Daddy, I’m too scared.”

            “I know, I know, but you don’t need to be scared.  Mommy and Daddy are home and we are protecting you.  The snake is more scared of us and doesn’t want to hurt us.  It’s probably just here to eat mice or rats.”

            I winced.  I could’ve kicked myself.  My daughter didn’t know the rustling sound in the walls was likely a family of mice or rats, or some other creature that first attracted the snake into the house.  I knew snakes couldn’t force their way into a home.  They used holes chewed by other animals, and then just followed their food.  I’d already checked around our foundation and in our basement.  We didn’t have a nest of snakes, so far as I could tell.  It was probably just the one, chasing down a meal.  But my daughter didn’t need to know that.  Fortunately, she hadn’t picked up on my last comment.  She was more focused on staying awake to make sure the snake didn’t get her, and I assumed she had snake nightmares when she did fall asleep, poor little girl. 

            I’d searched around the house and tried to find any openings.  I’d found a few very small holes, probably made by chipmunks or mice, but I was inexperienced at this kind of thing.  It was time to find out how to get rid of snakes, and whatever else had attracted it.  I wanted my daughter to be able to easily fall asleep at night, I didn’t want my wife to be unpleasantly surprised by a live snake on the bathroom floor again, and I wanted to be able to sleep the whole night through with no rustling noises in the walls.  Time to get a professional.  Enough was enough!

Snake Removal

snake removal
           Most guys assume they can do snake removal themselves, but then, most guys don’t assume they’d come toe-to-face with a rattlesnake in their kitchen first thing in the morning.

            Gary woke up late in the morning, after working an extra shift the night before.  Finally, a day off, and he wasn’t going to do anything at all.  Just make some coffee, toast a waffle, and sit in front of the TV for a few hours before maybe getting around to a shower. 

            He grabbed a fairy clean t-shirt out of a pile on the floor, threw on a pair of shorts, and staggered into the kitchen, bare feet slapping on the tile floor.  He got the coffee going and grabbed a waffle out of the freezer, throwing it into the toaster oven.  Then, he saw something move out of the corner of his eye.  “What the . . .?”

            A snake’s head coming around the corner, long body slithering behind it, and then its tail rattled.

            “No freaking way!!!”

            First thing he did was get out of that kitchen.  Then, he got some shoes on, toes still curling from having been so close to a rattlesnake.  Finally, he grabbed a camera and a phone.  Took some pictures of the snake from a safe distance and called a friend to help him with snake removal.  A rattlesnake was just not the kind of thing he wanted to go at by himself.

            The snake curled itself up into a ball on the floor under a counter, rattling its warning sign non-stop.  Gary had run into a bunch of rattlesnakes last summer when hiking with a friend.  They were hiking off a mountain cross-country, not caring much for the marked trail, and started jumping down the slope, leaping from rock to rock.  He jumped on a rock and the sound of ten to twelve snakes rattling stopped him cold.  Right under his feet was a whole nest of ‘em, and they weren’t happy he was standing right above them.  He got off of that rock pretty quick and out of danger, but now one of their kind was curled up in his kitchen, and he just wasn’t okay with that.

            His friend showed up ready for snake removal, grabbing a makeshift snake-catcher out of the back of his truck.  Gary decided the best thing he could do to help was to just video the whole thing, stay out of the way.  Before long, the rattler was caught, stuffed in a garbage can, and in the back of his friend’s truck.  They headed out to release it on that same mountain they’d hiked the summer before. 

            For two weeks after, the first thing Gary did when he woke up in the morning was get some shoes on his feet before going into the kitchen for breakfast.